Self-confidence is a positive attitude of an individual that enables him to develop positive judgments both on himself and on the environment or situation he faces. where he feels he is competent, confident, capable and believes that he can because it is supported by experience, actual potential, achievements and realistic expectations of himself.
Confidence is one aspect of personality that is very important in human life. People who believe confident in their own abilities and have realistic expectations, even when their expectations do not materialize, they still think positively and can accept it.
According to Thantaway in the Dictionary of the terms Guidance and Counseling (2005: 87), self-confidence is a mental or psychological condition of a person who gives a strong belief in himself to do or do something. People who do not have confidence have a negative self-concept, lack of trust in their abilities, because they often close themselves.
Self-confidence can be interpreted that a trust in one’s own abilities is adequate and is aware of the capabilities possessed can be utilized appropriately. Psychologist W.H.Miskell in 1939 had defined the meaning of confidence in his book that reads “Self-confidence is the belief in one’s own abilities that are adequate and aware of their abilities, and can use them appropriately.” It is none other than the ultra-famous psychologist Maslow who said “Self-confidence is the basic capital for the development of self-actuality.
With confidence people will be able to know and understand themselves. Meanwhile, lack of confidence will hinder the development of self potential. So people who lack confidence will be someone who is pessimistic in facing challenges, afraid and hesitant to convey ideas, and hesitant in making choices and often comparing themselves to others. “Confidence can apply in all aspects of life, such as socializing, business, politics, career, etc. The ways to grow self-confidence are:
Be relaxed, not too formal, if it is too formal it will narrow down your thinking and will create a stiff atmosphere. By being relaxed, what is being faced or done will run with a relaxed and calm atmosphere without tension.
2. Forget the standards set by others
Do something according to the standards we have, don’t follow the standards of others. Other people have different values, and no matter how hard they try, we can never satisfy everyone. Don’t worry if people call us fat, thin, lazy, boring, stingy, silly, or any other name. Stick to the standards we have, not the standards that others have. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. We are small but agile and smart, fat but smart, boring but creative and so on.
3. Improve appearance
Improve appearance, indeed what is actually seen by others for further recognition is self-attitude and personality, but the appearance also needs to be shown better so that people can be interested in seeing our appearance. Keep an attractive appearance not tacky and excessive, cut the hair according to taste but not strange, wear the right clothes that are not torn up (he he he don’t take it too seriously), and use other attributes just naturally.
4. Improve yourself
Improve ourselves, both in terms of personality, attitude, character and so on. Similarly, exploring talent, skills and abilities to become a great human being. With these improvements someone will become a better person, besides that will grow self-confidence.
5. Always Positive Thinking
By thinking positively we will do something without the burden of the mind, confidence will grow. Therefore, eliminate negative thoughts that exist in yourself. Develop positive thoughts that will influence actions to become better personal.
6. Everyone has advantages and disadvantages
Do not be insecure if you see other people have advantages, because behind the excess he must have disadvantages. Likewise, on the contrary do not be inferior to your shortcomings because behind that you have advantages. Just do what you can and do your best.
7. Try and do it
Just try what you want to do, and do what you have to do. Who knows you get what you want. If it fails, it means that you are someone who dares to try, different from other people who only become spectators. Do the best in your opinion, as long as it’s a good job then you don’t need to worry about anything, good actions will not harm anyone including yourself.
8. Place shame in its place
Do not be wrong in putting shame in place, if stealing does not feel embarrassed, if it violates the rules it is said to be great, but if you do good we feel ashamed as opening a business and doing the other good. If you can’t put shame in place, you will be insecure about doing good things.
9. Become yourself
Every person has been given by God goodness and strength, no need to be inferior to self-deficiency. Be yourself by doing your best, because other people aren’t necessarily better than you. We know what is best for us, therefore do our best and improve ourselves and develop ourselves to be better.
10. Highlight the advantages
To increase self-confidence, highlight the advantages possessed, because then we will believe in our own abilities. Don’t feel inferior because we also have advantages like other people who have advantages.
In addition to the above methods there are several other ways, including being friends with people who are confident, free to think and express, learn from mistakes and be grateful for what we have.
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